Bribery

Appeared from Friday, July 2, 1965 to Sunday, July 2, 1967

Part 1: Man of Many Plans

Bribery’s real name was Joe Packet, a.k.a. Mr. Bribery. He was a dope runner, blackmailer, confidence man, extortionist and killer. Bribery was a small thin man with wide eyes and a perpetual evil grin on his face. The band of people who worked for Bribery included his sister, Ugly Christine, a headshrinking South American Indian named NahTey and his secretary, Miss Deal.

To the many politicians and petty crooks who visited him for “help,” Bribery appeared to be a friend, always willing to assist. However, as he provided them money with one hand he was picking their pockets to get it back with the other. All his meetings were recorded on video tape and were used later to blackmail his victims. When Matty Square came for assistance, Bribery extended his insincere hand. Bribery showed Matty Square his collection of shrunken heads of people that had crossed him and it unnerved Matty.

Bribery put Matty on his payroll as a go-between, to make cocaine pickups at Nah Tey’s shop. Bribery paid Matty a “commission” for doing his job and then stole the money back when Matty wasn’t looking. One day, Nah Tey dragged Matty Square before Bribery saying that Matty was a spy for the police. As proof, Nah Tey gave Bribery an atomic powered camera that he discovered in Matty’s car. Bribery threatened to have Nah Tey shrink Matty’s head, but first he subjected Matty to a lie dector test. When Matty passed the test, Bribery forgave him and had Ugly Christine brand him between the eyes with the letter “B”. Matty then belonged to Bribery – body and soul.

Bribery then assigned the terrified Matty to kill Dick Tracy. Bribery set up the atom powered camera to lure Tracy to an old meat processing plant where a vat of boiling water awaited him. However, Ugly Christine’s clumsiness caused Matty Square to fall into the vat instead, killing him instantly. Bribery, Ugly Christine and Nah Tey escaped from the plant in time before Tracy arrived.

Bribery’s next plan was to kill Junior, Moon Maid and Honey Moon Tracy in the park with nerve gas. However, Moon Maid zapped Bribery and Ugly Christine and left them siting on a park bench in a snow storm. Nah Tey found them and carried them to his apartment. There, they received medical treatment from Doctor Dawn, who revived them.

When Bribery learned that Nay Tey had decided to kill him instead of Tracy, he paid Diet Smith’s space pilot, Maay, to capture Nah Tey and eject him into space from the Space Coupe. Bribery next arranged for Joel Deadlead and Yolly Times to kill Maay. Bribery then trained The Twins to fly a space coupe and had them steal one from Diet Smith. Aboard the stolen space coupe, Bribery and Ugly Christine’s plan to eject The Twins into space went badly and The Twins ended up in control of a gun and the space coupe. Accidentally, the $100,000 in bills that Bribery was going to pay The Twins for their work was ejected into space.

Bribery talked The Twins into landing the Space Coupe so he could get them another $100,000. As The Twins counted the money, Ugly Christine killed one of them with the spike heel of her shoe and Bribery shot the other one in the head. Leaving their bodies in an abandoned basement, Bribery turned his thoughts to recovering the $100,000 from space.

Later, Bribery and Ugly Christine realized that Tracy had located their hideout and was on the roof. Bribery shot at Tracy and Ugly Christine attacked him with a knife. Sam, Lizz and the police arrived in air cars and Ugly Christine was captured. Bribery and Miss Deal managed to escape through a secret door and they hid out in a cheap loft room across town.

With Tracy now in possession of Bribery’s shrunken head collection and all the films he used to blackmail his victims, Bribery realized that he was finished. If the police didn’t get him, his enemies would. Tracy trailed Miss Deal to the loft room and smashed through the window with his air car, shooting Bribery and capturing him and Miss Deal. Bribery was put in the prison hospital. Later, he was taken to the state penitentiary.

Part 2: Prison Escape

Bribery had made many friends at the State Penitentiary in which he was incarcerated. He bribed the warden of the pen to let him be picked up at night from the roof of the carpenter shop by a space coupe piloted by Chin Chillar and his wife. The space coupe had been stolen from Diet Smith and, when it landed, Bribery attached a wire cage to the front of it. All three then took the space coupe to locate Bribery’s $100,000 that was in earth’s orbit. They garnered all the money inside the wire net and then they celebrated with champagne. When Bribery passed out from too much drinking, Chin Chillar hovered the space coupe over the State Penitentiary and ejected Bribery, who crashed through the roof of the carpenter’s shop and died instantly. Bribery’s body was taken to the morgue.

Reprinted with permission from the author Victor E. Wichert “The Dick Tracy Encyclopedia Oct. 4, 1931 – Dec. 25 1977″

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